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I’ve been having a look around for fun things to do over the Christmas holidays. So first off, I thought a quiz might be fun and Googled for a bit and found a couple of Christmas themed ones that should create a few laughs.

Can’t tell you the questions or answers as family are readers! And I’m not telling you where they are either, don’t want them cheating!

Google also offered another possibility – alternative lyrics to carols. Ooh, now that sounded interesting 😉👍

I found a couple of versions of the Twelve Days of Christmas, and decided it would be fun to make one up, so that’s what I’ve done. Result below

Twelve Days Of Christmas Food

(To The Tune “Twelve days of Christmas”)

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me:
Twelve Pies of mincemeat
Eleven blobs of whipped cream
Ten fancy chocolates
Nine stollen slices
Eight balls of stuffing
Seven roasted parsnips
Six Brussels sprouts
Five onion rings,
Four crunchy roasties
Three turkey slices
Two spoons of gravy 
and
an extra large gaviscon

Or how about this one from funny Christmas carols.
Rusty Chevrolet

(To The Tune “Jingle Bells”)

Dashing through the snow in my rusty Chevrolet.
Down the road I go, sliding all the way.
I need new piston rings. I need some new snow tires.
My car is held together by a piece of chicken wire!

Chorus
Oh, rust and smoke, the heater’s broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio’s okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rusty Chevrolet!

I went to IGA to get some Christmas cheer.
I just passed up my left front tire and it’s gettin’ hard to steer.
Speeding down the highway, right past the county cops.
I have to drag my swampers just to get the car to stop.

Chorus
Oh, rust and smoke, the heater’s broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio’s okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rusty Chevrolet!

Bouncing through the snowdrifts in a big, blue cloud of smoke.
People laugh as I drive by; I wonder what’s the joke!
I have to get to Wal-Mart to pick up my layaway,
Cause Santa’s comin’ soon in his big, old, rusty sleigh!

Chorus
Oh, rust and smoke, the heater’s broke, the door just blew away.
I light a match to see the dash and then I start to pray-ay.
The frame is bent, the muffler went, the radio’s okay.
Oh, what fun it is to drive this rus-ty Chev-ro-let!

And this one really made me laugh 😂😂

The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen

(To the Tune “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen”)

The restroom door said Gentlemen
So I just walked inside
I took two steps and realized
I’d been taken for a ride
I heard high voices turned and found
The place was occupied
By two nuns, three old ladies, and a nurse
What could be worse?
Than two nuns, three old ladies and a nurse.

The restroom door said Gentlemen
It must have been a gag
As soon as I walked in there I ran into some old hag
She sprayed me with a can of mace
And snapped me with her bag.
I could tell this just wouldn’t be my day
What can I say?
It just wasn’t turning out to be my day.

The restroom door said Gentlemen
And I would like to find
The crummy little creep who had the nerve to switch the sign
Cause I’ve got two black eyes
And one high heel up my behind
Now I can’t sit with comfort and joy
Boy, oh, boy
No, I’ll never sit with comfort and joy.

There are  plenty more, go have a look see!

 

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